The Golden Rule

Today, as we continue to look at the aphorisms toward the end of Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount, we come to what is arguably, his most famous teaching, the Golden Rule. In English we know it as something like, “In everything do to others as you would have them do to you; for this is the law and the prophets” (Matthew 7.12). The Greek is even more emphatic, something like, “In every single way you would wish people act towards you, you also act towards them.” It’s a simple idea, and some version of it is found in the wisdom traditions of most cultures around the world. But its universality does not make it any less profound or important.

Under-girding the Golden Rule is empathy — the ability to understand and share what another person is feeling — and the Rule suggests that empathy can be learned. In any situation in which we have to deal with someone else, we ask ourselves, “If I were them, how would I want to be treated?”, and only then, do we act, and act in that way. The sneaky thing about this approach is that, rather than present a person with a long list of how to treat, and not treat, other people, it relies on their own self-interest to be the guide to their actions: If I want my work valued, I will value the work of my employee. If I want to be treated with respect, I will respect the wait-staff at the restaurant. If I want my rights to be protected, I will protect the rights of others.

Critics of the Golden Rule have pointed out that our own feelings are not reliable guides to what others may want. And this is a fair critique. It would be even better to ask someone how they want to be treated, since we don’t all want the same things. The best example of this is the insight behind the ‘love languages’, in which different people value certain expressions of care differently. To one person, a beautiful gift could be the best way to show appreciation, but to another person, that gift can feel like being ‘bought off’, so it may not be experienced as love. So yes, ideally, we’d ask others how they’d like us to treat them — the so-called ‘Platinum Rule’. But, the Golden Rule is still a great first step, and again, has the genius of bringing the person’s self-interest into the equation, so that even if they may not know to treat someone well for the sake of the other, they might at least do it for their own sake.

An interesting detail in the verse that I hadn’t noticed before is that Jesus ties the Golden Rule to the Scriptures, as essentially another summary of the Law and the Prophets. The more famous summary of the Law is, “Love the Lord your God with all your heart and all your soul and all your mind …. And love your neighbour as yourself” (Matthew 22.37, 39). But here it’s even more succinct, “Do to others as you would have them do to you.” I think this is great, since it ties perfectly into the ethic of the Sermon on the Mount, which is essentially that the best way to show love for God is to show love for your neighbour. (And remember, according to Jesus, your neighbour is the person you’d least like them to be.) If we have truly experienced the grace and love of God, we will pass on that grace and love to others — especially those we’d prefer not to.

This can’t be stated strongly enough. We live in a world where Christians are known to be the most demanding customers, the worst tippers, the most critical neighbours, and to advocate against the rights of those whose ‘lifestyles’ they ‘disagree with’. None of this is in line with the teaching of Jesus.

We as Christians need a thorough reboot. And we could do far worse than to take the Golden Rule as our starting point, from which everything else might follow.